My Big Fat Greek Meh

Menu

Location: 

George's Beechwold Diner

4408 Indianola Avenue Columbus, Ohio 43214

(614) 447-0944

About a year ago, Poke and I tried to go to the Beechwold Diner on a Sunday in between church services, hoping they wouldn't be very busy and we would miss the rushes. We walked in with our infant son, and stood there for about three minutes just waiting to be greeted. There were plenty of waitresses running around, and the front door can be seen from every single spot in the restaurant. The place was packed, with no available tables, and since we weren't acknowledged at all, we ended up walking out.

Hey lady, where's the eats? A guy can't live on crackers!

A few weeks ago, a friend and I wanted to get together for lunch and try someplace new. I figured I would give the diner another chance, since a few of my friends are constantly raving about it on Facebook. We met around 11am, and it wasn't packed, but there were only two free tables. I had my son with me, so luckily I was able to get a spot where we could put the high chair.

I LOVE FOOD!

I ordered a Reuben, which came with chips. I asked if I could substitute fries for chips, and she said no, I could only order a side of fries and then I wouldn't get my chips. That pissed me off. If I'm paying for chips and fries, I want to get chips and fries. I told her to please give me the chips as well. I didn't get any chips. I got my son an ala carte pancake and one scrambled egg, which he wolfed down before I could even try a bite, so I'm going to assume they were good... but he's a toddler now, so basically all food is good to him. The Reuben was pretty good, lots of meat and sauerkraut and just the right amount of dressing. I prefer my rye bread to be more toasted, but at least it was only raw on the edges. The fries were fine, but there was nothing special about them. Just fries. I like Wendy's or Penn Station's fries better. I really missed the chips.

Reuben

My friend got a grilled ham and cheese with chips and coleslaw. She said the coleslaw was good, crisp and creamy and not too soupy. It looked like Steak'n'Shake's coleslaw to me, which is one of very few coleslaws that I like. She said her ham and cheese was tasty. We decided to get some dessert, and I got the apple pie and she got bread pudding. After she took the first bite, I could tell the bread pudding wasn't good, and she confirmed it. Blech. My pie, however, was delicious - although I highly doubt it was homemade, unless they have a 5-star patisserie in the back.

'Slaw

Grilled ham & cheese and chips

Now let's discuss the drink situation. I ordered a Diet, as always, and a water for the kid. I had to flag her down several times to get a refill, and eventually she just started ignoring me. For the last half of my meal, I ended up drinking my son's water because I couldn't get the waitress to give me any more pop! My friend ordered hot tea, and was charged three times, once for each cup of tea that she had. Seriously? $1.59 for hot water? Wow.

Our tab was pretty steep, considering the lackluster experience. I really don't think a meal at a diner for a kid and two women should cost more than $20, but it does at George's Beechwold Diner. Totally unacceptable.

Yes, that says $33.14!

Overall Scores: (1-5, 1 being lowest, 5 highest)           

Cleanliness: 3 (it's a really old place that is in need of major upgrades)

Value: 1

Accessibility: 1 (only 4 parking spots, easy to miss from the road)

Friendliness: 1

Menu: 3

By the end of our meal, the place had cleared out.

 You can visit their website here.

"Authentic" New Mexican Food? Hardly.

Location:

Chile Verde Cafe

4852 Sawmill Road, Columbus, OH 43235

(614) 442-6630 ‎

I have eaten at Chili Verde a dozen times in the last ten years, and each time I go I wonder why I came back.  The food isn’t horrible, the service isn’t horrible, but there is just something about the place that gets on my nerves.

Expensive Chimichanga (mostly sauce)

Crazy Confusing Menu

They claim to serve “authentic” New Mexican food, meaning less of a Mexican influence and more of a Native American influence.  In my opinion, it’s really more of a tiny Don Pablo’s without the lavish décor and giant margaritas.  The food tastes good, but I can’t put my finger on what’s missing… well, in some dishes I can – salt.  A lot of their plates would be much better if they just added some seasoning, and didn’t try so hard with the condiments. There are too many wacky “salsas of the day” and about five different sauces to choose from (none of which are New or Mexican, at least not to my knowledge).  On this trip, I ordered a chimichanga ($11.99, about $4 more than any other restaraunt) and the mango salsa (complementary), which contained not mango, but cantaloupe, and I wondered how many people they tried to fool with this concoction.  The portions are a good size, comparable to most Mexican restaurants, but even so the price just makes me cringe.

"Mango" Salsa

Regular Chips & Salsa

Overall, for the price, it’s not worth it.  If you want great food at a fair price, this is not the place for you.  If you would rather have mediocre food at a steep price, then by all means head over to Sawmill Road and hit up the Chili Verde!

 

Is this what New Mexico looks like?

Overall Scores: (1-5, 1 being lowest, 5 highest)           

Cleanliness: 5

Value: 2

Accessibility: 4

Friendliness: 3
Menu: 2

Leftovers

Kould Do Better

Location:

KDB

Easton Town Center

Columbus, Ohio

(no phone number available)

My little brother recently got a position as server/bar back at the new KDB at Easton.  He was given passes for family & friends to go and check it out before they opened to the public, so my mother and I took the chance for a free meal & headed out that way.

KDB is located in the old Game Works on the 1^st floor of the inside part of the mall between AMC and the Funny Bone.  When you walk in, the atmosphere is nice, not crazy like Game Works was, and you can tell that a lot of work, or at least a lot of money, went into revamping the area.  Upstairs is the kitchen, where there are booths, and the bar, which is 21 and over.  The bar features cyber bowling, some old-school video games (like Pac-Man), pool tables and a few couches.  Downstairs is where the party really gets started, and that is where we were seated.

Unfortunately, our server, Jeff, was an ex-boyfriend of mine and we had not parted on spectacular terms, so I was hoping that 5 years later he wouldn’t recognize me.  He came over and took our order, explained the concept of the “den”, and got our drinks.  We had received a ticket saying what we would be eating (yes, they chose for us) and the “choices” were nachos with chicken and BYO Pizza.  I mostly despise chicken so I asked if I could substitute nothing or beef instead, and my mom got the BYO (Build Your Own) Pizza with bacon, pepperoni, extra cheese, tomatoes, and light sauce.  Jeff was kind enough to get my nachos with steak, and the food arrived in a fairly timely fashion.  I had expected quicker turnaround but I supposed if the kitchen staff wasn’t used to being on full-service and this was their first time, I could give them a break.  My mom loved her pizza, raved about it, and I thought it was mediocre.  No better than any random pizza at any random non-pizza establishment.  The nachos, however, were freaking HUGE and topped with lots of stuff, which made me happy.  Black beans, jalapenos, sour cream, cheese, cheese, cheese, green onions, tomatoes… yeah, they rocked.  I even had to take some home and three days later when I microwaved them, well, they were chewy (haha) but they were still delicious!

Along with the free meal (more on that later) we each received a 120 token game card.  I played a few games for tickets and got jypped so I headed over to the football game (you know, where you toss the not-fully-inflated football into a too-small hole) and won a bunch of tickets there.  My mother found some kind of spinning dino game & made out like a bandit on tickets.  The games might have been more fun if they were all in working order, but for free what could we expect?  For all the tickets we won, the prizes were shit... Christmas pillows and stuffed animals from the “Grinch” movie, or a dolphin.  I HATE DOLPHINS.  I took one anyway and gave it to the cats to play with.  I also took a “Grinch” dog, the one with the antler tied to his head.  So lame.  My mother, being the hoarder that she is, took one of everything and two of something else.

Overall, I was not impressed.  For being a chain restaurant, this place has no website, no information, and no history to be found anywhere.  When I Googled the name, all that came up were a few profiles on arbitrary review sites, and they all linked back to a Gary Danko of California.  Supposedly he’s the owner… we may never know for sure.  On top of that, our meal would have cost $28.00 (without tip).  The pops were $2.25 each and both of our meals cost about $12.  For the amount we got, $12 was ridiculous.  Yes, the nachos were huge and yes, it was a whole pizza (remember when Pizza Hut had small pizzas?  That’s how big it was, 6 slices), but even so I don’t think it was worth $28 total.  Besides that, if we had had to pay for two 120-token cards, how much would that have set us back?  $40 more dollars?  The prices of cards weren’t listed anywhere, so I had no idea how much they were.  My mom wants to go back when my dad comes to town, while my brother is working, so she can harass him like a good mother.  If she’s paying, hell, I’ll go.  But I would never waste my money on a place with mediocre food just for the “atmosphere” of “fun”.  That being said, if they have a deal where it’s food & game combo, I might go – if it’s $15.99 or less.

Overall Scores: (1-5, 1 being lowest, 5 highest)           

Cleanliness: 5

Value: 2

Accessibility: 5

Friendliness: 5

Menu: full menu: unknown, happy hour menu: 4

Summer Series #4 - Grapes of Mirth

In the souls of the people the grapes of wrath are filling and growing heavy, growing heavy for the vintage. ~The Grapes of Wrath

 
Location:

Grapes of Mirth

59 West Spruce Street

Columbus, Ohio 43015

614-221-9463

Located on the east wall of the North Market, Grapes of Mirth is your one-stop-shop for all exotic beer and wine needs.  They feature over 600 wines and 200 beers, all crammed into a teeny tiny area comprised mostly of eight to ten foot high shelves and small wooden skids with the occasional haphazard stack of cardboard crates.

David Bihn has owned Grapes of Mirth since 2003 and, according to the website, has been with the company for over fourteen years.  He’s a friendly fellow,  always ready to lead you to your favorite bottle or suggest something new if they don’t have what you’re looking for; however, if they don’t have what you want, he will gladly order it on the spot.
 

Grapes of Mirth features artisan wines as well as “commercial” wines, and they carry a plethora of Ohio wines as well.  From what I could tell, many of the Ohio wines available are not readily available in your everyday local wine shop or grocery store.  Yay, Locavores!  They have the largest selection of Belgian beers in the central Ohio area, possibly in all of Ohio, and the best part of the beer selection (and the wine selection) is that if you ask David a question, odds are he knows the answer.  Not only does Grapes of Mirth have the physical inventory, they also have the mental inventory.

When I stopped by Grapes of Mirth, I was on a mission: find Vinho Verde, my number one most favorite wine of all time.  It’s a sweeter wine, which I normally don’t care for, but the fermentation and bottling processes cause the wine to have a slightly carbonated feel about it – not as fizzy as beer or pop but definitely more tickly to your tongue than a normal white wine.  I was in luck – big time – because David had just gotten in a large shipment of Vinho Verde!  There were four inexpensive choices ranging from $5.99 to $7.99.  At the time I thought I was just getting lucky on the price, for in the past I had paid up to $15.99 per bottle at another wine shop near Dublin.  Apparently Grapes of Mirth always sells their Vinho Verde for these low-low prices!  Having worked in yet another wine shop since that day, I can tell you 100% that you will NOT find a lower price on this delicious wine.

Official tasting parties or events are not regularly scheduled, but you can arrange a “private” tasting with the owner.  Obviously Ohio laws call for a charge, but this is typical of all alcohol tasting venues and events.  Also for sale at Grapes of Mirth are different accessories, such as gift bags, wine keys, corkscrews and so forth.

For more information, visit their website here.

Overall Scores: (1-5, 1 being lowest, 5 highest)                    

Cleanliness: 3 (everything has that dusty wine-cellar feel to it)

Value: 5

Accessibility: 3 (the North Market is easy to get to, the shop is easy to get to, the bottle are definitely not easy to get to!)

Friendliness: 5

Menu: n/a but the selection is mind-boggling!

 

Bluer than Ginger were her eyes...

Location:

Blue Ginger

6234 Sawmill Road

Dublin, OH 43017

(614) 792-3888

I love sushi. LOVE LOVE LOVE it.  So when my friend Josh wanted to take me out one afternoon for an impromptu sushi feast, I jumped at the opportunity to try someplace new.  We ended up at Blue Ginger in Dublin, a small restaurant in the middle of a small strip mall next to a Buy Backs and a few doors down from BD’s Mongolian BBQ.  I was unimpressed by the exterior, and feared it would be some sort of modern-fusion bright lights and wacky music type place.  Upon entering the first set of doors, I was immediately corrected when we were confronted (yes, confronted!) by a gigantic wooden door that seemed as if it had been transplanted from a 15^th century castle; I could barely open this door!

On the other side of this ancient-looking portal was a mahogany and wrought-iron fortress of deliciousness.  Beautiful leather booths, dim lighting and soft sitar-based mood music made me feel almost like Oriental royalty.  We were lead to a back booth by a gracious hostess, offered water, and then the magic began.  The hostess brought us two small plates with an individually wrapped warm cloth on each.  Superb!  I adore tiny details like that.  Josh did all the ordering, and we ended up with an overflowing plate of potstickers and two large platters of sushi.  The potstickers, which I had never had, were delectable.  The slightly crispy outside was nicely paired with a soft (but not mushy) meaty inside and complimented by a salty brown sauce. (*Note: when I went to Blue Ginger’s website to view the menu, I could not locate the potstickers anywhere.  I’m not sure if the menu is outdated or if they’ve been removed, but it would greatly benefit you to ask your server if they still have them should you desire the awesomeness!) 

After the appetizer came the main course – beautiful sushi.  I had been watching the Sushi Chef from our booth, and he was truly an artist.  There was no lump of wasabi or pile of shredded pickled ginger on our platters, rather, there was a beautiful ginger rose and a cute round nub of wasabi complete with hatch marks.  We indulged in the Crunchy Spicy Roll platter (salmon, tuna, yellowtail), the Mind Eraser (no rice, Chef’s special sauce, jalapeno, avocado and 4 types of fish), the Kamikaze (fried shrimp and tuna with tuna and eel on top), and the Scorpion King (soft-shell crab, tuna, cucumber and lettuce).  I already know what you’re thinking – “Oh my god, that’s a LOT of food!” and yes, it was a lot of food, but if you know anything about sushi then you’re full aware of the fact that not only are gourmet rolls smaller than generic store-bought rolls, but they also come in groups of 5-7.  For two people, that’s not really too much food!  We devoured almost all of it before I could take pictures… I was so happy to have all this gorgeous and remarkable sushi in front of me that I had to start enjoying it without delay!

After the main course, Josh being the spectacular human being that he is, decided we also need dessert.  He ordered the Key Lime pie (“Tastes like it came from a box in the freezer” was his only critique) and I had fried green tea ice cream, which, on the opposite side of a critique, tasted freshly made and scrumptious.  The last time I had fried ice cream was in 1998 at Chichi’s in Westland Mall – I was more than pleased to eat the gourmet Asian counterpart twelve years later!

Overall, despite a steep tab ($65+) for a meal that did not include alcohol, I have to say that Blue Ginger is an awesome restaurant.  My suggestion is to go for lunch and limit yourself to a few choice items, that way you can try something new and back it up with something “old” that you already like and not break the bank in the process.  I can understand why the prices are what they are; Sushi-grade fish is held to strict industry standards higher than regular fish, and only certain types of fish from certain areas can be used.  (For more information, click here).

Visit Blue Ginger's website by clicking here.

Overall Scores: (1-5, 1 being lowest, 5 highest)                    

Cleanliness: 5

Value: 3

Accessibility: 5

Friendliness: 4

Menu: 5